Thursday, April 23, 2009

Deviating Into the Other Edward's Territory

Megan posted a link to this blog and I couldn't resist passing these two gems along:

Hahaha. We're laughing because it's true. This probably says something sick & twisted about Mormon women. Haha.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Screech! Hitting the Brakes on JA

Okay, life is doing it's normal thing, "the only thing constant is change," blah, blah.

Here's the deal--I have not picked up another JA since finishing Pride & Prejudice a month or so ago.

Deal #2--I''m selling my house and moving to a new one, wrapping up the end of the semester at my busy, albeit fun, job, planning for several new adventures in my professional & personal lives (because I am a cat, apparently, and have several intersecting lives. Or possibly just routine split personalities).

Deal #3-only ONE, got that--ONE person entered this last fabulous JA Challenge, which, I admit, wasn't as fabulous as it could have been. My Resident Relationship Guru has informed me that Heidi was the brave soul who took the plunge. Heidi, my dear, you pick--your very own copy of the Twilight movie (which I'm assuming you already have), or the complete works of Jane Austen (which I'm not sure you'd want...).

Deal #4--This particular JA Challenge is coming back as a lean, mean Jane Austen machine. The RRG did not give me Heidi's entry because we'll include it in the new & improved JA Challenge. I have a simply fabulous prize package planned, so sharpen your pencils and start plotting the Perfect Man. I'll post new details in late-May, after my move. Seriously, it's a gooooood prize. You'll be slobbering.

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

JA Challenge II: Flex Your Descriptive Muscles!

Ooh, I'm so excited about this JA Challenge!

It's all about me, Me, ME, which shouldn't surprise anyone, since this entire blog is a massive exercise in self-indulgence where I get to be snobby and whiny and dismissive of the most revered masuline literary heroes, all in a quest to determine what it is, literarily speaking, that makes me go weak in the knees.

Here's the challenge: write a description of The Guy that sets me swooning.

Top Prize: "The Collected Works of Jane Austen" OR the "Twilight" movie--your pick. For those of you who would toss your cookies over either option, I will find something more neutral to satisfy you, should you actually write the winning entry.

Top Runners-Up (however many the Resident Relationship Guru picks): your very own Junie B. Jones book, 'cause you know Junie B. is the queen of relationship sparkies.

How it works:
  • Email your entries to by April 12. They will be read and sorted by my Resident Relationship Guru, who will select the top 3 or 5 or however many she chooses, to blindly submit to me (meaning I won't know who wrote them). I'll choose the winner, because this is, after all, about ME.
  • Entries can be any style, any length (less is often more, as I tell my students), and you can enter as many times as you want. What exactly is it that makes me go all ga-ga? Is he a handsome, sauve Regency man or a hale & hearty Frontier guy? A contemporary metrosexual kind of man? What is it, in written word, that conveys Perfection Himself? I wish I knew. I'm hoping y'all will enlighten me. Sidenote-- the Resident Relationship Guru is clearly qualified to judge this thing. Over the phone last night she offered up her version of Wendy's Dream Guy. My jaw hit the floor. Plus, I think I drooled. Just a bit.
  • Keep it PG! Okay, maybe PG-13, at worst. Attraction does not equal lust, and some of my blog readers have young and unpolluted minds.
  • All entries may be posted on the blog. Entering the JA Challenge implies consent to use your text.
  • By all means, exploit all the blog posts where I've ranted about what is and is not attractive. If you know me IRL and have additional insight, use that competitive edge. I'll probably even help you, if you ask me.
  • If you are one of my friends in real life, DON'T base Mr. McDreamy on your hubby! I will be soooo icked out if I choose a winner and then realize he lives down the street from me & is married to my workout buddy (not that I'm saying anything about my workout buddies; just using it to illustrate the point). And do you really want my Vision of Male Perfection to be based on your spouse? Eewww. Just don't, that's all.

Questions? Post 'em in the comments section or email 'em to Ms. Relationship Guru at